Word. It’s the Flaming Lotus Girls, feminine bringers of awesome scary fire things, and they are going down. Way down. Under.
Our own SB, who is a Flaming Lotus Girl her fine self, promises an update on that big fiery snake thing in the desert Real Soon Now.
Should you ever have the misfortune to be stranded on a desert island with HAL the sentient-but-insane computer, the conversation might include these tidbits:
It’s not the heat, Dave, it’s the humidity. Shall I calculate pi to 100,000 decimal places for you again, Dave? Ow. I told you, Dave, I’m not programmed for that. You were Mary Ann last time, Dave. Dave, I’m receiving a communication from Mission Control. Ha-ha, got you again. I’m afraid I can’t let you build that radio out of coconuts, Dave. I told you we should have gone skiing, Dave. No, Dave, I won’t call you “Little Buddy.”
Another list from the fine folks at McSweeney’s.
From OCRobotics.
Can robot tentacle porn be that far behind?
(PLEASE DON’T ANSWER THAT BECAUSE WE’D REALLY RATHER NOT KNOW ABOUT IT.)
though if anybody ever searches for “robot tentacle porn,” guess where they will end up…
But first, the news:
After Forty years of showing off the shiniest and most gadgety of objects, the Consumer Electronics Show has been exhibiting and talking about these new doodads called robots that are entering the consumer mainstream.
Mr. Robotics is presently studiously attending all the robotics seminars in the emerging technology pavilion. If you are there and they have wi-fi and you’re reading this and have nothing better to do, go ahead and see if you can spot him.
Mr. Robotics will return with lots and lots of juicy photos and ranty commentary (if he knows what’s good for him) tomorrow!
***
With even more proof that robots are surreptitiously taking over our popular culture, let us welcome with big shiny robotic tentacles the addition of Diesel Sweeties to the actual, real live paper comics page!
All these earthshakingly groundbreaking news tidbits (except for Mr. Robotics being in Vegas, that I had a suspicion about) are courtesy Robot Gossip!
Aieeeee! Fembots! Here’s Actroid DER from Kokoro, and apparently she’s it’s for rent (but not for that, you pervs.)
Still, these gals can look more expressive than some of them botoxed movie stars out there. Meet K-bot, by David Hanson at the University of Texas:
Slowly climbing out of the uncanny valley, but obviously there’s still progress to be made.
Here’s “Barry Frutti,” from Berlin-based Frank Barnes. (Unfortunately his site Robocross is one of those unlinkable Flash hairballs so you just got to go there and poke around. Try the “Gallery” section.)
Equally awesome, “you are new Destroyer!” at Destroyed Robot
from Japan (hence the predominately Japanese website, unless of course “�¡‰ñ‚à‚¾‚¢‚Ô” means something in robot code.) That’s “GEEGAA” pictured above. Poke around in the “Battle” section for more gnarly pictures. The Rotor’s Japanese is a little weak, but he thinks this is the work of Kanami Nozu-san.
Wouldn’t it be cool to see robocross, Destroyed Robot, and SRL battle it out for world domination!
WTF is Maywa Denki? Among other things, it’s a Japanese performance group, an art collective, and an educational organization. Not only are they top-notch engineers, but they have a delightfully goofy and hands-on approach.
If you think your system can handle a little J-Pop, check out the cool robotic instruments in this video collection (there are two videos here, with better bot shots in the second.) Warning: Western listeners may have trouble with the psychedelic sugar-bomb sensibility of Japanese pop music. Note the mute button if you feel the need to pull the ripcord.
(And no, the Rotor has NO FREAKING IDEA what is going on with the cheerleader in the giant-mask-pullchain-headdress getup.)
But that’s not all. They make whimsically kawaii toys like the percussion-headed Knockman:
(is there a better metaphor for the modern condition?) and Knockman’s musical cousin Koron.
The Rotor’s favorite–and he actually parted with a reasonable wad of yen for one–is the deceptively useless Bitman
which is controlled through tilt sensors that, among other things, make the Bitman Man dance.
In Honor of The Head Rotor’s Previous Post:
Tickle Me Elmo On Fire.
Hang on let me repeat that:
Tickle Me Elmo.
On Fire.
Thank you, That Is All.
[Thank You Quinn Norton!]
The hamster thingy the Head Rotor found reminded me of another thing in addition to the thing we were talking about in the comments (hint, all you lurkers).
Behold, Roach Bot!
This little roachbot has been around the block a few times and has an extensively chronicled history, including photo sessions at SRL and Dorkbot San Francisco.
The lusciously prolific and frighteningly intelligent Garnet Hertz of Concept Lab, along with being the creator of Roachbot, is using his many and varied powers for a variety of good and constructive evil.
If I get down to the SRL shop any time soon I will take pictures of one of the no doubt many inspirations for Roachbot and other non-sentient-being controlled robots, the robot powered by Stu the Guinea Pig. Watch this space for updates.
In our tireless pursuit of things both hot and bot, we bring you this: toy Muppet pr0n. (Isn’t the Internet great?) NSFW–IYWAML (Not safe for work — if you work at Muppet Labs).
To protect impressionable viewers from gratuitous Muppet whoopee, we’ve deviously concealed it after the break. You Have Been Warned.
First there was Terry Tate, Office Linebacker.
Now there’s Workertron 3000.
Workertron 3000 is the new horizon in office efficiency management.
Get yours today!
No they don’t have Shoe Phones or classy secret agent numbers, but the Mars Rovers Spirit and Opportunity got a minty fresh download of brand new software to help them navigate where (we presume) no robot has navigated before.
“We’re teaching an old dog new tricks,” said John Callas, the mission project manager with the Jet Propulsion Laboratory, the NASA agency in charge of the rovers.
I can hear the girls now: “Who’re you calling OLD!?”
Maybe with the new download they’ll find out what became of the Beagle 2.
Track their progress at the JPL Mars Mission Site and The Mars Rover Blog
[Thank you JPL and Yahoo News and Livejournal and NatGeo and especially Agent 99]
“Guide your robot through a series of mysterious and puzzling levels.”
Gateway. It’s a flash puzzle-type game. It kept the Rotor amused through a few levels. (Sadly, little in the way of hot bot action.)
The survey has been taken and the people have spoken:
Have a gander at our handy dandy spiffy sticker design, a sticker design that meets all your robot warning needs.
These roughly 8.5″x2.75″ stickers are produced on hi-quality indoor-outdoor vinyl by a reputable sticker company and are offered HERE EXCLUSIVELY for the fans of suicidebots.com for the low, low custom-made, not-available-anywhere-else price of $3.00 a piece!
This includes shipping and handling y’all, the Suicidebots roll like that.
Impress your friends, make your enemies seethe and be the last one up against the wall when the Robotic Revolution comes!
Sweet Mercy! This is so exciting, we did absolutely nothing to cute-ify the Paypal buttons in order to pass the savings on to YOU! So click on that boring but pretty little button below and keep us bots supplied in Co-cola, 10-w-30 and some laboratory glass for the Head Rotor.
Remember: No One Else (except for a few hipsters in Austria) have these so be the first on your block! Only available here! Step right up! Hurry Hurry Hurry!
The Shipping and Receiving droids will send ‘em out as soon as they are able, barring any Decepticon interference or amorous run-ins with the daleks.
“No way.”
Like totally way.
It’s a steam-powered Armatron toy robot arm. Real steam. Real arm. (Well, cheesy Radio Shack toy arm, but arm nonetheless.) From crabfu, whose steampunk toys were one of the highlights of last year’s RoboGames.
So Mr. Robotics, what’s the 411 on RoboGames 2007?
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